I've been talking to Him a lot with a great sadness hanging over my heart - and in His sweet, tenderness He has been comforting me. My sadness has been the result of the great defeat I see Christians living every day; and when I talk about miracles, I only see their eyes glass over - or I recieve arguments. So, I cry. Deeply. Asking Him why His children live in such a way? Why? He is just as capable and just as willing to accomplish the same things He did when He was in a physical body of His own - He is still here, in us.
Today, He made me aware of the smallest verse in the Bible - "Jesus wept". So, I went there. It's in John 11.
33 When Jesus saw her sobbing, and the Jews who came with her [also] sobbing, He was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. [He chafed in spirit and sighed and was disturbed.]
34And He said, Where have you laid him? They said to Him, Lord, come and see.
35Jesus wept.
36The Jews said, See how [tenderly] He loved him!
37But some of them said, Could not He Who opened a blind man's eyes have prevented this man from dying?
38Now Jesus, again sighing repeatedly and deeply disquieted, approached the tomb. It was a cave (a hole in the rock), and a boulder lay against [the entrance to close] it.
39Jesus said, Take away the stone. Martha, the sister of the dead man, exclaimed, But Lord, by this time he [is decaying and] throws off an offensive odor, for he has been dead four days!
40Jesus said to her, Did I not tell you and [a]promise you that if you would believe and rely on Me, you would see the glory of God?
And I saw it. In verse 33. "He was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. [He chafed in spirit and sighed and was disturbed.]" Jesus did NOT cry because Lazarus died. He was troubled and "chafed" in spirit and sighed. It is the same reaction I have been suffering for a couple weeks. And Jesus experienced the same response.
Even the children of God have different levels of Faith. I cannot judge or critisize their choice at their level of maturity - because it is a choice. And Father God gave them the right to free will.
Psalm 119:5-7
" Oh, that my ways were directed and established to observe Your statutes [hearing, receiving, loving, and obeying them]!
6Then shall I not be put to shame [by failing to inherit Your promises] when I have respect to all Your commandments.
7I will praise and give thanks to You with uprightness of heart when I learn [by sanctified experiences] Your righteous judgments [Your decisions against and punishments for particular lines of thought and conduct]."
We learn "by sanctified experiences". And we all share this method of learning. It is what takes us from glory to glory to find out how to live in His guidance (statutes) and come to the place of recieving His promises as a result.
In the meantime, He doesn't reject us, or close the door on us for our choice to live less than victoriously. No. The door is always open. And if we choose defeat in this life; we will find it in full when we are gone home to be with Him.
Thank you, Jesus, for your love is unconditional. You give us these choices, and don't reject us even when we reject or fail to learn the promises, the victory, and the overcoming.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Friday, January 14, 2011
Isaiah 54:11-12
11 " . . . behold, I will set your stones in fair colors [in antimony to enhance their brilliance] and lay your foundations with sapphires.
12And I will make your windows and pinnacles of [sparkling] agates or rubies, and your gates of [shining] carbuncles, and all your walls [of your enclosures] of precious stones.
He pointed specifically to this scripture when I asked Him about my business and future. And the first time I read it, it didn't sink into my heart. But He kept impressing me to read it over and over. And when I did - suddenly this jumped out and the light bulb turned on. I saw how beautiful this was, and how oppulent, how rich, how strong, and how amazing this would be. I imagined seeing this building from far away and realized that it would shine and gleam like nothing I've ever seen. It would attract people from all over the world, who would come to see it. And they would sit in front of it amazed. They would sit for hours just to appreciate the beauty. Then they would want to touch the gates and the walls to see what that kind of oppulence feels like. This picture is not something that most of us can even imagine. But God did. And this was how he saw His people. Even after their turmoil and disobedience - this was how He saw them, this was how He was building them.
And then He let me know that THIS is His intentions for ALL His people. But even more than that, He impressed on me NOT to limit this to just a spiritual sphere. His interest in me - in us - covers EVERY aspect of life. His intentions covers EVERY aspect of life.
But I have to SEE it to ACCEPT it.
I was stunned. It took me a long time to comprehend what He was saying to me. I held the Word gingerly in my hands as I slowly began to comprehend what He was saying to me. And I realized that how I see myself is sooooooooooooo much less than He sees me.
It brought tears to my eyes - and a thrill to my life.
As Mary said - I said, "let it be unto me as You have spoken". Amen.
12And I will make your windows and pinnacles of [sparkling] agates or rubies, and your gates of [shining] carbuncles, and all your walls [of your enclosures] of precious stones.
He pointed specifically to this scripture when I asked Him about my business and future. And the first time I read it, it didn't sink into my heart. But He kept impressing me to read it over and over. And when I did - suddenly this jumped out and the light bulb turned on. I saw how beautiful this was, and how oppulent, how rich, how strong, and how amazing this would be. I imagined seeing this building from far away and realized that it would shine and gleam like nothing I've ever seen. It would attract people from all over the world, who would come to see it. And they would sit in front of it amazed. They would sit for hours just to appreciate the beauty. Then they would want to touch the gates and the walls to see what that kind of oppulence feels like. This picture is not something that most of us can even imagine. But God did. And this was how he saw His people. Even after their turmoil and disobedience - this was how He saw them, this was how He was building them.
And then He let me know that THIS is His intentions for ALL His people. But even more than that, He impressed on me NOT to limit this to just a spiritual sphere. His interest in me - in us - covers EVERY aspect of life. His intentions covers EVERY aspect of life.
But I have to SEE it to ACCEPT it.
I was stunned. It took me a long time to comprehend what He was saying to me. I held the Word gingerly in my hands as I slowly began to comprehend what He was saying to me. And I realized that how I see myself is sooooooooooooo much less than He sees me.
It brought tears to my eyes - and a thrill to my life.
As Mary said - I said, "let it be unto me as You have spoken". Amen.
Friday, January 7, 2011
My dearest Lord, God; Father of my Lord, Jesus Christ;
I want with all my heart to tell You what a most wonderful comfort and joy You are to my soul. As You teach me each day, how to walk in Your Way; I become even more amazed at how much different You are than anyone has ever told me and how Your Way is so deeply free-ing and fully completes me with satisfaction I never knew existed in this realm in this life on this earth. I know now as a matter of experience how fully You immerce me and carry me into the kind of paradise that was your primary plan for man on this earth. I know now that this plan was not destroyed, but rather made even greater and more possible through your great and immeasurable love. I could not be more thrilled to know you; more honored to call you my God; or more humbled that you bestow this most beautiful priviledge on me your humble servant. My life is Yours forever and ever.
I want with all my heart to tell You what a most wonderful comfort and joy You are to my soul. As You teach me each day, how to walk in Your Way; I become even more amazed at how much different You are than anyone has ever told me and how Your Way is so deeply free-ing and fully completes me with satisfaction I never knew existed in this realm in this life on this earth. I know now as a matter of experience how fully You immerce me and carry me into the kind of paradise that was your primary plan for man on this earth. I know now that this plan was not destroyed, but rather made even greater and more possible through your great and immeasurable love. I could not be more thrilled to know you; more honored to call you my God; or more humbled that you bestow this most beautiful priviledge on me your humble servant. My life is Yours forever and ever.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Abide
Today as I talked to Him, He seemed to be so intent on listening to me; just as a friend would lean over and look intently into your eyes as you try to describe something important. I paused a minute and thought 'why would He do that when He already knows my thoughts?' And immediately I knew. Because "He is my friend". He wants me to confide in Him in the same way that I would my best friend. Not to come to Him and complain about something or tell Him my list of wishes or tell Him of everything that went wrong today. Yes, I can do that. But He doesn't enjoy that anymore than I do. So, I was talking to Him about a business meeting coming up soon. It is important to me that He is deeply involved. He assured me that He would be. I actually "gave" Him the meeting and asked Him to orchestrate it. Then He gave me a scripture and assured me that it was His special Word to me for this time in my life.
I read it and tears filled my eyes. And I was overwhelmed with His thoughts of me.
It was a bit like having the President call me on the phone and tell me that he knows about me and what kind of person I am and how much he thinks of me. My first thought would be 'how does the President even know about me out of millions and millions of people'? And why would he care to call me and tell me anything at all? And why would he be so "nice" to ME????
But this was even better than THAT! This was GOD!!!
I actually sobbed for a few minutes. I was so overwhelmed.
After a few minutes I felt Him ask "why are you crying?" And I didn't know how to answer. But I stammered out something about it being so wonderful.
He just said "I understand".
I read it and tears filled my eyes. And I was overwhelmed with His thoughts of me.
It was a bit like having the President call me on the phone and tell me that he knows about me and what kind of person I am and how much he thinks of me. My first thought would be 'how does the President even know about me out of millions and millions of people'? And why would he care to call me and tell me anything at all? And why would he be so "nice" to ME????
But this was even better than THAT! This was GOD!!!
I actually sobbed for a few minutes. I was so overwhelmed.
After a few minutes I felt Him ask "why are you crying?" And I didn't know how to answer. But I stammered out something about it being so wonderful.
He just said "I understand".
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