Most churches and preachers are ignoring the small group that are stirring up all the ruckus about Jesus coming tomorrow at 6pm. I was mostly doing the same thing.
Until today, when a mood of introspection came over me and lingered most of the day. Of course, the first place that can lead is to self-condemnation. But I refused to go there, because that is NOT God's game.
However, I did continue to look back through many of my experiences; good and bad; weighing them. Remembering the moments God used me to help someone and change a course of defeat - is, of course, the best. Those are moments to treasure forever and ever. There is no reward better than to know you are used by the Father. Then there are those moments when I hesitated, and lost that reward. But, His forgiveness was immediate, so I don't carry them around with me.
Contemplating meeting your Savior brings a wonderment of . . . how will it feel, what will it look like, . . . and on and on. But bottom line, when I stand in front of Him (if I can stand at all) I want more than anything I could ever imagine; to hear Him say "my Child, well done!". There is absolutely no one in this world that could ever affirm me like He can.
As I drove around today with this contemplation lingering in the air; my thoughts swirled around these things. Then as I was finishing my day and on the way home, it happened.
The Crescendo! His Spirit touched my heart and I soared! I knew suddenly that if Jesus were coming tomorrow at 6pm, I would not be able to sleep tonight or wait through the day! How absolutely wonderful could that possibly be? More than anything I could ever imagine or dream!
Oh, how magnificent the thought!!!!!!!
Friday, May 20, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
"sensual" and "greed"
"17 So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. 18 They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. 19 Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed." Eph 4:17-19.
I see it, Lord; the futility of thinking. We do it all the time. We read your Word and then we try to "figure" it out. We call our friends and talk to our Pastor and bring it up in Bible study. Then we all try to "figure" it out or share what we "think" it means. And it's all futile. How you've been showing me that Your Word cannot be understood except by insight and revelation through the Holy Spirit. Without this, we completely mess it all up and interpret wrongly.
This "futility" of thinking causes us to live in "darkened understanding and separated from the life of God. WOW! That one is a huge kicker, Lord - "separated from the life of God. That is your Holy Spirit within us.
And that ignorance is due to hardening of the heart. You taught me about that recently that anyone can have it - even the best Christian. It is basically when we think we can do anything at all without You. Most of the time, it's things we don't even think about - it's our routines, our habits, our everyday life. We go about doing everything and don't even consider You. All of these things would change so drastically if you were really first and primary in our thoughts. It's the sensitivity - sensitivity to You that this is talking about.
This "insensitivity" leads to sensuality. I had to look up that word, because we all think it means something sexual and it doesn't.
SENSUAL: relating to or consisting in the gratification of the senses or the indulgence of appetite
I see it, Lord; the futility of thinking. We do it all the time. We read your Word and then we try to "figure" it out. We call our friends and talk to our Pastor and bring it up in Bible study. Then we all try to "figure" it out or share what we "think" it means. And it's all futile. How you've been showing me that Your Word cannot be understood except by insight and revelation through the Holy Spirit. Without this, we completely mess it all up and interpret wrongly.
This "futility" of thinking causes us to live in "darkened understanding and separated from the life of God. WOW! That one is a huge kicker, Lord - "separated from the life of God. That is your Holy Spirit within us.
And that ignorance is due to hardening of the heart. You taught me about that recently that anyone can have it - even the best Christian. It is basically when we think we can do anything at all without You. Most of the time, it's things we don't even think about - it's our routines, our habits, our everyday life. We go about doing everything and don't even consider You. All of these things would change so drastically if you were really first and primary in our thoughts. It's the sensitivity - sensitivity to You that this is talking about.
This "insensitivity" leads to sensuality. I had to look up that word, because we all think it means something sexual and it doesn't.
SENSUAL: relating to or consisting in the gratification of the senses or the indulgence of appetite
: devoted to or preoccupied with the senses or appetites
So it's just basically anything having to do with our 5 senses and indulgence - which of course leads to that last statement about greed. And we all think "greed" has to do with money. It doesn't. Indulgence IS greed.
Thank you, Lord for that Word. I will "chew" on that today.
I notice the phrase the Apostle Paul used in the beginning, "I insist on it". This isn't impossible for us - it's absolutely necessary.
Friday, May 6, 2011
my prayer, Your promise
You are my Shepherd to feed, guide and shield me; I don't have any lack.
You have given me fresh green pastures to lay in; You have given me paths beside calm, still waters.
You always refresh and restore me and give me the right paths to walk in Your will; not because I deserve it; but because of Jesus name.
And even though I am walking through a world full of evil and destruction, I'm not afraid nor do I dread anything, because you are right beside me; Your Holy Spirit protects me and Your Word guides me - this is comfort to me.
You cause my comforts and needs to be already answered right in front of the evil around me. You fill me with Your own Spirit and flood me with blessings.
I am convinced that I will only have goodness, mercy and unfailing love with me all my life and be always in Your presence.
You have given me fresh green pastures to lay in; You have given me paths beside calm, still waters.
You always refresh and restore me and give me the right paths to walk in Your will; not because I deserve it; but because of Jesus name.
And even though I am walking through a world full of evil and destruction, I'm not afraid nor do I dread anything, because you are right beside me; Your Holy Spirit protects me and Your Word guides me - this is comfort to me.
You cause my comforts and needs to be already answered right in front of the evil around me. You fill me with Your own Spirit and flood me with blessings.
I am convinced that I will only have goodness, mercy and unfailing love with me all my life and be always in Your presence.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
heavenly dimensions
Uncharacteristically, I found myself reading Revelation 4 & 5 and it fascinated me, confused me, and yet left me somehow with a faint hint of feeling like I had seen stuff like this when the Spirit lets me see. I thought; "if I could close my eyes and rise into the Spirit, and read this at the same time, I think I could see it". It was a strange thought and yet, it made sense to my heart. How can the four living creatures around the throne, look like four distinct creatures and yet also have eyes everywhere, even within them. Then I remembered "God inhabits the praise of His children". That's another one. How can God, Himself, inhabit praise? Just as "the Word was with God, and the Word was God". How can Words be God?
But something seemed familiar and suddenly I could see in my heart the dimensions being more than one, or two, or three, but more. Like when I saw the accident my children were in, and yet I was looking at the TV. I described it like a hologram in the middle of the room. I could see through it and therefore, I could still see the TV. Yet, I could see the accident very clearly.
So, I thought of those creatures around the throne as being like a hologram, with the outer shape as the creature mentioned; lion, ox, man, and eagle. Then somehow the eyes inside just a little and again farther inside.
I thought about the fact that they praise the Lord continually day and night; and yet in other places they are doing and saying other things. How can this be?
I have listened to testimony's and story's of people describing experiences of seeing heaven. I remember one who said he could step on the flowers and they would lay down and spring right back up; or bite into the juicy fruit which would drip onto his robe and yet there would be no evidence of it.
It is definitely such a different place than this one. A place of more than three dimensions. A place of such beauty and perfection that we can only barely begin to fathom.
I've heard the music cannot be described because of it's many facets and beauty. And there I can relate a bit. The moment I stood in that church and God enveloped me in His beam of light/water/love/music I heard that sound very faintly. That was many years ago, but it's something I'll never forget. The beauty was indescribable. And yet no one else around me saw it, or heard it, or felt it. How can that be?
I read today about the emerald halo/rainbow around the throne. I cannot imagine it in my mind, but my spirit says there is familiarity there. My spirit knows this stuff. It probably knows because His Spirit lives inside me.
I love being in His presence. No thought of sadness can live here. It seems like a dream. Yet, I know with all my being that it is very real. Not only is it real, it is the forever and ever kind of real. This reality that we know is not.
But something seemed familiar and suddenly I could see in my heart the dimensions being more than one, or two, or three, but more. Like when I saw the accident my children were in, and yet I was looking at the TV. I described it like a hologram in the middle of the room. I could see through it and therefore, I could still see the TV. Yet, I could see the accident very clearly.
So, I thought of those creatures around the throne as being like a hologram, with the outer shape as the creature mentioned; lion, ox, man, and eagle. Then somehow the eyes inside just a little and again farther inside.
I thought about the fact that they praise the Lord continually day and night; and yet in other places they are doing and saying other things. How can this be?
I have listened to testimony's and story's of people describing experiences of seeing heaven. I remember one who said he could step on the flowers and they would lay down and spring right back up; or bite into the juicy fruit which would drip onto his robe and yet there would be no evidence of it.
It is definitely such a different place than this one. A place of more than three dimensions. A place of such beauty and perfection that we can only barely begin to fathom.
I've heard the music cannot be described because of it's many facets and beauty. And there I can relate a bit. The moment I stood in that church and God enveloped me in His beam of light/water/love/music I heard that sound very faintly. That was many years ago, but it's something I'll never forget. The beauty was indescribable. And yet no one else around me saw it, or heard it, or felt it. How can that be?
I read today about the emerald halo/rainbow around the throne. I cannot imagine it in my mind, but my spirit says there is familiarity there. My spirit knows this stuff. It probably knows because His Spirit lives inside me.
I love being in His presence. No thought of sadness can live here. It seems like a dream. Yet, I know with all my being that it is very real. Not only is it real, it is the forever and ever kind of real. This reality that we know is not.
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